REVAMPING FINANCES - OCTOBER 2009

October is a month of revamping finances. For the past few days I've been taking a good look at my income and expenses, debts, etc. A long-awaited revamping will be taking place over the next few days.

First of all, I'm eliminating ALL credit cards. Those that have balances are being cut up as we speak, and I will continue to pay on them till balances are zero. Cutting them up prevents me from using them in the meantime. Can you imagine how hard that is for me? LOL But it's sooooooo necessary. My bank cards can serve as Visas for booking and travel. I'll live on a cash basis.

My spending has got to be cut back to zilch. I am not buying any more home decor, furnishings, etc. No more collectibles. While accounting for my purchases over the past few months to get an idea of where my money has been going ... I was surprised at the amount I spent on "stuff and collectibles" for my house. That ain't gonna happen any more. I have more than I need as it is. In fact, I could open a shop with all my "stuff." (not a bad idea) So, no more "treasure hunting" sprees. No more reckless spending.

I've already cut back entertainment and dining out. It's next to nothing as it is. So no problem there. The two majors have been credit card spending and buying "stuff."

AND buying electronics ... my downfall. Electronics and online purchases - websites, website related services, books, etc. All that is stopping. It has stopped!

I'm going to live within my fixed income ... that's income I receive not counting royalties and revenue generated through my publishing companies or freelance writing. I want to be able to live on the basic income, the rest that comes in goes into savings.

So are you aware of where your money goes? It's mind-awakening, believe me, once you start checking it out. I was shocked when I began studying my finances. WOW! No more shocks for me.

BIRTHDAYS ARE THE PITS!

My birthday happened a few days ago. Sons and daughter and their SOs were here, enjoyed that.

But all day long, today, the thoughts have pushed and pulled at me ... random thoughts about aging, thoughts that range from 'why didn't I write and publish 30 years ago' to 'I want my 40s & 50s back.' I want my trim body back. I know, I know. Stay in the now. Stay in the present. Stay positive. Be happy where you are and with what you have. Be grateful. Be thankful. I know. I read it and I hear it all the time.

But, let me tell you something. When you're facing maybe, just maybe, only 15 more years of productivity at your best, I'm sorry, the positive attitude seems to diminish a bit. That's what is happening today. It's diminishing.

Then I think of Catherine Cookson who was writing yet another novel at 91 when she had an instant fatal heart attack. The moment before her death she was dictating a manuscript into a recorder. What a woman! Some of you know how fond I have been of her. Even wrote a stageplay about her. Yes, she's my idol. What is this morbid pit I'm in today? Having anxiety about death and wondering if I have enough time left to do all I want to do.

Okay! So, I've got maybe 22 more years left. Hummm. I can do a lot in 22 years. I can write at least 22 more novels. One book a year is what I write. I could write more if that's all I do, but with the publishing companies, my time is shared with other writers' works. I can accomplish a lot in 22 years. Health is all important, though. Must work on that.

Alright. I'm feeling better. I just needed to spell this out, to vent to myself. I'm okay.

Tomorrow's Monday and I've a list of things to do ... so I'll get my positive back and surge forward. I'll pull out my positive readings and "The Secret" and "The Supermind", etc. Yep. I'm okay.

So I think I'll have a glass of wine and watch a good movie before going to bed. I need to relax.

Nite all.